Too Funky For Words

[Bruce Brakel]

The US Patent Office issued a patent last month for a near light speed spaceship engine that operates by creating a field of warped space-time.  How funky is that?  The guy who obtained the patent has patents on a lot of fairly normal stuff like an autofeed mechanism for weed eaters.  If anyone wants to bet me that this is an urban legend, I'll dig up the US Patent Office webpage where they published the patent.  

It sounds like a science fiction story.  Ordinary humanoid looking space alien gets marooned on backward planet.  His society's laws require him not to interfere in the ordinary development of our society by introducing new scientific advancements.  So he makes a living for ten or twenty years "inventing" ordinary common-tech gizmos we have not gotten around to thinking up yet [like the metronomic automobile] that he misses from his home planet.  Then one day he is reading an advanced physics text book to see if it is too soon to invent the microwave extractor [it instantly cools things, just the opposite of a microwave oven, indispensible when you want a properly chilled beverage right now] and says to himself, "Wow.  All the theory for gravity drive is sitting right here in their bollixed up version of quantum mechanics.  All the liquid methane they could ever want or need is sitting on Titan 80 light minutes away.  There has got to be a deal I can make with Exxon-Mobil here that will get me home."  

For you serious Star Trek fans, also last month the US military announced that they have invented transparent aluminum, 100 times as strong as glass.  I think they just played Star Trek III in slow motion and copied Scotty's notes.  Again, if you will bet me it is an urban legend, I'll dig up the news article.  

[Guest]

I don't believe you Bruce!  I will bet you $0.25 (two bets of $0.25 each) for both those urban legends!  So, let me see the patent and news article.

[DougEDawg]

That was me up there.  Didn't realize I wasn't logged in.

[MDR_3000]

For you serious Star Trek fans, also last month the US military announced that they have invented transparent aluminum, 100 times as strong as glass.  I think they just played Star Trek III in slow motion and copied Scotty's notes.  Again, if you will bet me it is an urban legend, I'll dig up the news article.

I think you mean Star Trek IV.  


Holy Hell, I'm a nerd....

[mirth]

Mmm... humpback whales.

[mirth]

Transparent Aluminum:
http://physicsweb.org/articles/news/8/8/9


Found a warp engine patent:
http://pat2pdf.org/patents/pat6960975.pdf

[mirth]

Warp engine patent @ uspto.gov:
http://patft.uspto.gov/netacgi/nph-Parser?...5&RS=PN/6960975

[Bruce Brakel]

For you serious Star Trek fans, also last month the US military announced that they have invented transparent aluminum, 100 times as strong as glass.  I think they just played Star Trek III in slow motion and copied Scotty's notes.  Again, if you will bet me it is an urban legend, I'll dig up the news article.

I think you mean Star Trek IV.  


Holy Hell, I'm a nerd....

III, IV, IX -- I was never good with Roman numerals.  THe one with the "nuclear wessels."  

[damonshort]

Warp engine patent @ uspto.gov:
http://patft.uspto.gov/netacgi/nph-Parser?...5&RS=PN/6960975

...doubles as a putting enhancer...

[Chainmeister]

Gosh.  I always thouth the Warp Drive was invented by Dr. Zefram Cochrane.  
But then again, I always thought Farmer Hoggett had a pig that could talk.    

[drdye]

Man that last post truly is "to funky for words"  

[Bruce Brakel]

That last post will get deleted and everyone will think you are a Star Trek geek with limited understanding of the concept "funky".    

[mirth]

lol

[drdye]

hehe  

[Bruce Brakel]

Dave Barry mentioned this product in his holiday gifts column and now they are sold out.  And they are NEVER MAKING ANYMORE!  If you see them on e-Bay be sure to post about it here.

[Jon Brakel]

kiss celebriducks on e-bay!

More!

[mirth]

No idea why the spammers like this thread versus all the others on this board... Maybe we should rename it to 'Too Spammy for Words'?

[Chainmeister]

No idea why the spammers like this thread versus all the others on this board... Maybe we should rename it to 'Too Spammy for Words'?

Maybe the funk in "funky" is magnetic for spam.  Perhaps a new title to the thread will help.  You are the digital guru and would know better. I defer to higher powers, but "what the funk?"

[mirth]

I dunno. they keep reviving ancient threads on a different board I run, so no idea. we could always lock this thread and start a new one, but they're gonna spam somewhere....

[Jon Brakel]

Fun with signs.

http://atom.smasher.org/chinese/